Air Traffic

Last night was my first solo outing since April 19th. It was excited to say the least. I got to the airport at around 7.pm. and I could here engines buzzing all around me. I looked up and even saw a little helicopter flying low in the pattern. Everybody had the same idea I did and decided to go out the airport as the summer sun was beginning to set. I was nervous because I didn’t like the idea of flying around in the pattern with so many planes. As I preflighted the plane I could hear plane after plane take-off from the runway. I decided to go up at least once to see if I can handle it.
I taxied up and in the pattern to find one plane in a left hand pattern and a helicopter in the right hand pattern. Ok, no biggie I can work with this. I waited for the plane to touch and go in front of me and radioed for the helicopter position. He was holding for me ( I forget helicopters can just hold) and I was off. Right after I took off an idiot in a Grumman that I hope I never meet again pulled onto the runway. He could barely speak English and was making all kinds of weird calls that night. Furthermore I don’t think he knew where I was in the pattern the whole time. I knew that Grumman was faster than me and apparently he didn’t. Anyway I take off and make my first left hand turn. I hear him radio he was “leaving the runway” which I thought was some kind of abort to the taxiway but no, he meant he was taking off. Ok no biggie… he doesn’t even really know english.
Now it gets hairy.
He makes his call that he is turning base while I was about to turn base. I radio, “did you say base?!”
No Answer. I turn and look around… Fuck, where is he?
Now I’m at final and call final. A little while later I hear him say, “did you say you were on final? Where are you?”
OK, that is not something you want to hear when you are controlling the plane at low speed, low to the ground about to land. I radio back quickly. “yeah I’m about to cross the threshold”
No answer back.
My landing flare then proceeds to suck and I know I can’t spend too long trying to save this landing much less pull off the runway with this RETARD right on my ass.
I initiate a go-around and start a climbout.
As I’m climbing out he radios “ Cessna do you see me?”
This is too much, I don’t know how this guy flies a plane legally. I radio “Cessna 59 Julia is leaving the pattern to the southwest”.
Right after that I hear, “Grumman Alpha turning crosswind”
CROSSWIND!!!! He must have been right behind me, retard.
I climbout out and away from that madman. I go out 5 miles to clear my head.
I fly around and try to relax a bit. My heart was pounding but I looked outside I started to relax. The view was beautiful as always. This is the reason I put up with the headache of pattern traffic.
Then I hear a plane say he is departing and going to be orbiting the runway at 1400 feet. Oh well, he’ll be over my head when I get there.
He will be long gone out of the pattern airspace by the time I get there though.
Then I hear the Grumman retard say he has landed. Alright, I’m going back for some pattern work. I do a 180 and come back in to land. As I am positioning myself to enter on the downwind leg I hear he is taking off again.
SHIT, why does this guy haunt me so?
Ok, I’ll just get behind him. I do a turn for spacing and I hear another call.
“Be advised I’ll be using the grass below you cessna 59”.
I radio back “Copy at what altitude?”
“oh about 800 feet”
Ok, I see the guy above the horizon orbiting doing tricks at 1400 feet. I see the cub tacking off under me and I hear the retard making his base call. I’m at 1000 feet and radio I’m entering the downwind leg.
I hear the retard’s final call and I am comfortably midfield in the downwind leg.
The retard exits the runway as I am on turn from base and I land.
I came down like a ton of shit.
I pulled up way to hard and ballooned up. I gave it a little power which was the wrong thing to do. I cut power and come down again.
Wheels touch but I have too much speed and hop up again.
I’m flying a little and a second touchdown. This one is better and I’m down. I taxi off the runway.
No more touch and go’s. I’m burnt out for the day.
Grand total, 1 go around and 1 landing.
I worked hard for them though.